Ok, finally here it is! I’m just going to jump right in…
This was a crazy, awesome, lovely birth! I feel privileged
to have had the experience. This labor was my first real personal experience
with some of the doula techniques I have been using over this past summer with
my doula clients and I must say, WOW! What we do helps so much! Haha! I am so
blessed to have had my two wonderful “doula-mates”, Heather and Nancy, with me
through this journey, and of course, very, very blessed to have had Matt
alongside me, supporting me, as well.
November 6 was my actual due date. But October 31 was the
projected due date from the ultrasound at 7 weeks. (We only had the one this
time.) So, naturally, after Halloween, I kept wondering when labor was going to
begin. I wasn’t anxious to not be pregnant; I just wondered when labor was
going to sneak up on me. Do you know what I mean? It’s kind of like looking out
the window a thousand times waiting to see your love come up the driveway. And
nesting was in full swing. I mean I have never before prepared for a houseguest
like I prepared for this baby! I think the reason for that is I knew how much I
was not going to get accomplished after his arrival, because I would be too
busy loving on my sweet ones and trying to rest. So Friday morning, I kind of
thought I would go into labor. It was my grandmother’s birthday, and I thought
it would be nice to have the baby then. (I keep saying “the baby” because we
didn’t know the gender.) I didn’t. Well, actually, I did have a sign that labor
was close, but not much contraction action. So Friday night, Matt was off work,
so I used that time, as I had the entire month of October it seemed, to clean.
I did not realize how disgusting my cabinets and walls were until that night. J I
cleaned and cleaned and cleaned, including the kids’ bathroom. I got in bed
around 10:30 and I immediately heard a huge thump that shook the house, which
meant Jack had fallen out of bed. So I go and put him back in bed and realized
he was soaking wet. So I took off his diaper (he is potty trained, just
sometimes needs a diaper for night,) and changed him and tucked him back in. He
didn’t even wake up. I took the diaper insert to the freshly cleaned bathroom
and proceeded to dump the inside of the diaper in the potty. It’s made to flush
down and then the other part is biodegradable, blah, blah, blah, anyway… I
flushed the toilet with all that diaper stuff in it and of course, OF COURSE,
it overflows. Gets everywhere. All those little gel diaper particles all over
my clean floor, along with about an inch of water. Why am I telling you this,
you ask? Well, number one, it’s my blog and I want to remember as many details
as possible. Also, I think the
clean up of that huge mess possibly aided the labor to begin.
Saturday morning, I wake up with yet again, the sign that
labor is near. I begin to clean up the rest of the mess in the bathroom. We
thought the little gel pieces might be easier to remove if they dried a little
bit. I notice contractions were definitely there, nothing painful, just there.
I call Matt at work and tell him he might need to have a back-up plan for his
shift on Sunday and possibly Monday. I didn’t know for sure that I was in
labor. I just had that feeling. I told Matt I wasn’t sure if we would have a
baby that night or the next day or even the next day, just that he should
probably be prepared to not be at work. I texted my doulas just to give them a
heads up and then I went on about the day. I think we went to Chick-fil-a
probably. Ha!
That afternoon, Matt was off already, and the kids needed to
get outside and play, so we met my doulas at Hamilton park, near our house with
Heather’s little girl, (because Audrey and Jack love to play with her!) Nancy
and Heather massaged my shoulders and neck and during the contractions some
comfort measures, while I sat on my big yoga ball. My hips were not great at
the end of the pregnancy, so I knew sitting on the ground or a hard bench would
not be good. It was really fun being outside with everyone! The weather was
beautiful, nice and sunny and bright! Contractions were there, but not steady.
I was beginning to think baby would not be born this weekend. It was getting a
little chilly, and I was getting hungry, so we left and I invited everyone to
go eat at Betty’s. I had beef stew ready at home in the crock-pot, but I was
craving a cheeseburger! Once we got to the restaurant and sat down, my
contractions picked up and got a little more intense. Again, nothing really
painful, but just noticeable and to where I wanted to breathe a little during
them.
After dinner, Heather took her baby girl home, and Nancy
came with me to the house. Matt and I bathed Audrey and Jack and put them to
bed around 8:00. Nancy and Matt and I watched a movie after that because I
wanted to get some oxytocin flowing by laughing. I thought maybe if I got to
laughing pretty hard that maybe my water would just BREAK all of a sudden. See,
I never had a spontaneous ROM, and I was actually kind of nervous about it. I
don’t know why. I also figured once my water broke it would be game on, baby
time. I was right about that, but I’ll get to that part. We watched The Family
Stone. It is one of my favorite movies, but I didn’t laugh much. So, I watched
the Office episode where Pam is in labor and has her baby. Oh, and by this time
Heather had arrived with Matt’s Sbux drink. It was a full on labor party! I was
loving it! Contractions were sporadic, so I thought I would get out the clary
sage. I read in my essential oils book that it helps bring on contractions and
also helps relieve pain and, for some, creates a mild euphoria. Well, that’s a
no-brainer; I’m doing it! It really did help my contractions to become more
regular. Heather and Nancy massaged my hand, feet, neck and shoulders, and
would do hip squeezes. I had never felt that during labor and it shocked me how
well they worked and took away the pain! (What doulas do really does work!
Hahahaha!) After the episodes, I think Nancy suggested Matt start playing his
guitar. So Matt started playing some worship songs, and I sang and so did Nancy
and Heather. Well, this must have been a little loud, because Audrey woke up
and came in and sang with us, too. This was about 10:00. She looked through my
doula book and kept asking me to show her in the book what we were doing right
that moment. That was pretty cute. Also, singing worship songs was wonderful,
especially since I was surrounded with so much love and support and fellow
believers. Then, maybe Nancy had reminded me that I had wanted to take a bath,
so we drew up the largest tub of water that I have ever had for a bath, ha, so
that I could be completely covered with the warm water. It was so relaxing.
Heather had a tissue with clary sage on it and kept it in front of me so that
contractions and pain relief would continue. I’m not sure at this point how far
apart they were, maybe 3-6 minutes or so. It wasn’t that important, really. I
knew I wasn’t near the end yet. Nancy and Audrey poured water over me and Nancy
would periodically go get more hot water to keep the bath warm since our hot
water heater didn’t have enough to fill the tub up all the way. I think at this
point we sent Matt to bed. He had been up at 3 am that morning and needed to
rest.
I finally stopped shaking enough to get up to go to the
restroom. I heard footsteps and Nancy had come in to check on me. Apparently
she and Heather’s “doula-senses” started going off because they both woke up
about the same time I awoke. They just knew I needed them and that it was time
to continue on laboring. I go into my living room and my contractions are about
30 seconds to 2 minutes apart. I’m swaying and squatting, still able to talk
through them, but they were definitely intense. Nancy told us to call someone
to come over to stay with the kids and she began getting her car ready with
blankets, pillows, towels, etc., to transport me to the hospital. While she was
doing that, Matt called some women from our church. Leah ended up already being
awake, so she began to head on over. I told everyone I felt like I was about a
6, and sure enough, I was. I was totally ok with that! So I had gone from a 3
to a 6, with Walker a lot lower than before, while sleeping for the most part
in about 3 hours! Yaay! I asked Matt to start playing the guitar again so we
could sing some more. Singing really helped distract me and ease some of the
pain. We hadn’t called Dr. J yet, and someone suggested we go ahead and do that
since he likes to be in the know about his patients. It was about 4:30am, and I
felt like we had some time, so I thought I would let him sleep a while longer. J
Labor is continuing, but contractions aren’t coming as
frequently as they were when I woke up. Nancy and Heather and Matt all take
turns massaging my back and hands and feet and swaying with me and helping me
move around. The sun is coming up. I called Dr. J and woke him up at 5:59am. I
told him we would have a baby today and to get his game face on. I bet he
wondered why I was so chipper. I think I also called my parents at this point,
too, and told them they could head up this way whenever they were ready.
Anyway, contractions are getting annoying at this point. I have cuss words
going through my head. Slowly the comfort measures aren’t comforting me much
anymore. At one point Matt was helping me through a contraction and whatever he
had done the contraction before that had helped suddenly did not help me and he
said, “Well, what do you need me to do?” I said, “I don’t think there’s
anything you can do for me at this point that will help.” And then the next
moment he did a hip squeeze and kind of lifted me up and I said, “Well that
worked.” All the ladies said, “Awwe, how sweet!” Haha. Sorry, I just had to add
that moment in here. It was cute.
Around 7am, the kids are waking up. They eat breakfast and
they are excited that they will have a new baby soon. Audrey is massaging me
and brushing my hair and Jack just wants to cuddle and run around and play. I
decide to lie down in the floor and cover up and rest for a while. This is not
working out well with Jack. So we decide to get him ready for church and send
him on with Leah. Nancy threw out the idea of having Audrey stay with us for
the birth because she has been so involved so far. We had actually already
considered that and asked Audrey what she wanted, and she decided to stay with
us. So, I laid on the floor for a while, maybe half an hour or 45 minutes just
kind of zoning out and focusing on my contractions. I said goodbye to my
tearful Jack, which about broke my heart. I had Matt call Leah a while after
that and she said he stopped crying as soon as they pulled out of the
neighborhood. Praise the Lord for that. I’m so glad he was ok, and that he had
Leah to take care of him.
Here’s where it gets a little foggy. I know that I stood up
and then every time a contraction would come I would hit my knees or squat and
try to find a “comfortable” position. This lasted for a little bit. I decided
to go to the bathroom, which is always a good idea during labor to basically
help your body relax and continue contractions effectively and basically clear
the path and make more room for the baby to descend. I came back to the living
room, and was laboring by the arm of our couch. I saw my parents pull up and
considered having Matt tell them to just go drive around. I know my dad doesn’t
do well watching me in pain. Well, Matt didn’t really understand what I was
saying and they came inside. It was slightly awkward. Matt began making some
coffee with my dad because dad was trying to stay out of the way. Suddenly, I
felt something happen, maybe it was Walker dropping, I’m not sure, but it was
time to go. I said, “Someone call Dr. J, it’s time to go to the hospital.” Well
this sent everyone into action. Nancy and Heather were rushing around grabbing
all of our stuff and situating Audrey. Matt was laboring with me here and
there. I think it took about 10 minutes before everyone was ready to leave.
By this point, I was really unable to move. I walked about
10 feet and hit my knees and held onto a dining room chair and screamed through
a huge contraction. Everyone around me was telling me to “Come on, let’s get in
the car!” “We have to go!” I’m
thinking, “Do you not think I know that??” I was so mad that I had to move from
that point, though. My entire body was telling me to stay put and birth my
baby! I almost told my dad he better get out of the room because I was about to
have the baby right there. I really didn’t think I could get up. But as the
contraction passed, I started to stand up and Matt and Heather were on either
side of me as I walked hunched over outside to the car. We made it to the
carport and my water broke. (Yaay! It broke outside! Don’t know why I cared
about that.) Here’s where I had my first real urge to push. They took me to the
car and helped me into the back of Nancy’s hatchback. I was on my knees holding
onto the passenger seat headrest. (I totally recommend this position for labor!
J
It was pretty comfortable.) Nancy was in the back with me, Matt drove. Heather
drove her car and took Audrey with her.
I figured I would have a little time once I started having
the urge to push. After all, it took me 3 hours with Audrey and 4 hours with
Jack after I had the first urge with him. I wanted to be pushing by the time I
got to the hospital. But as we exit the driveway, I’m thinking this is not
going to be long. I don’t know exactly, but Matt said we made two turns out of
the driveway and he heard me say, “I’m crowning!” Nancy said, “No, you’re not
crowning…Yes, you’re crowing.” I don’t think she could see at first because I
still had my leggings on and the baby was still coming down. I pushed maybe 2
more times and there was Walker! Nancy said, “Look at the time! See what time
it is!” So Walker was born at 9:24 am right in front of 1st
Presbyterian, about 4-5 minutes after the first urge to push! We were about
halfway to the hospital at this point. Matt called Dr. J, whom had just been
talking to Heather. Matt said he said, “You just had the baby in the car,
didn’t you?” Haha! Evidently, Heather had already filled him in on what she was
seeing from her car behind us, (which was my behind!) It got quiet at this
point because Nancy was wiping him off and getting him all clean and stimulated
to cry. I asked her if it was a boy or girl, and she said she hadn’t seen yet
and that I would be the one to announce it. I looked down and Nancy turned him
slightly and I said, “It’s a boy!” I think after that I said, “I just had a
baby in a car!”
People keep saying I just waited a little too long to leave.
Actually, no, I don’t feel I did. I feel like God totally organized that to
happen perfectly. I really wanted to have a homebirth. It didn’t work out for
that to happen this time, for many reasons, one main one being Alabama’s law
about not allowing midwives to attend homebirths. (Please check out http://www.alabamabirthcoalition.org/
to see why it is important to change this law.) So I got pretty close to having
the birth I wanted. It was wonderful to be able to labor all at home, not have
to lie in the thin foam bed and be hooked up to the monitors for 20 minutes
upon arrival and every 15 minutes or so after that monitored with the Doppler
and the blood pressure machine, as is standard, have my blood drawn during
labor, etc. I understand the necessity for these things, I suppose, and a
midwife would have monitored me during labor as well, but I’m just saying it
was great to not have to do those things. I am so thankful for our health and
safety!
We pulled up in the hospital parking lot and Dr. J met us
outside. We were all giddy and so happy! Dr. J picked Walker and me up and put
us into the wheelchair to take us inside. It was cold that day, but I could not
feel it. I was on such a high. It was a beautiful day, an awesome labor, and an
awesome delivery. I am so thankful to my doulas, Nancy, Heather, (and Audrey!),
and to Matt for supporting me and surrounding me with love. I am thankful to
Leah for helping us out with the kids, and all the ladies from our church,
really, for their servants’ hearts. I am thankful for Dr. J for being the best
OB I could ask for, and his sweet family, and all the sacrifices they make for
the community. I am thankful for Walker, thankful to my Jesus for once again
blessing our family with this beautiful child, and for walking with me through
the labor and birth.
Thanks for reading my birth story. Sorry it was a book!